From the editor
You're invited: Support local independent journalism at TucsonSentinel.com's holiday shindig
PLEASE JOIN US FOR A CELEBRATION of whatever it is you/we/they celebrate this time of year — especially a belated 228th birthday of the Bill of Rights (Dec. 15), or the impending tenth (!) birthday of TucsonSentinel.com (Jan. 22).
We'd like to get together with those who contribute their time, talents, money, comments and good wishes to our project, and thank you all for your continuing support.
We look forward to seeing you, and raising a glass to the season and to our freedoms — especially a free press. And while you're toasting, PLEASE HELP US KEEP YOUR LOCAL NONPROFIT INDEPENDENT NEWS SITE AROUND for another year, with your TAX-DEDUCTIBLE GIFT: http://www.tucsonsentinel.com/opinion/report/110119_newsmatch
And here's an important section of this annual missive: When you donate anytime during December, YOUR GIFT to support local nonprofit news will be MATCHED, dollar-for-dollar, by the special NewsMatch program.
This important initiative to strengthen selected nonprofit newsrooms is funded by a group of national foundations including the John S. and James L. Knight Foundation, Democracy Fund, Ethics and Excellence in Journalism Foundation, Facebook Journalism Project, and others. This is a great opportunity to help us produce more of the strong accountability journalism you have come to expect from TucsonSentinel.com. So put Pierre Omidyar's money to work here in Tucson, and help out your authentically local nonprofit news site:
Subscribe and stretch your donation over time:
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By accepting this greeting, you are accepting these terms and agree to be bound by them in perpetuity, or until Frank Milstead gets a speeding ticket (pretty much "forever" then, right? The bio of "The Colonel" on the DPS website is a hilarious jambalaya of organizational gibberish, by the way: "Colonel Milstead employs and cultivates an inspiring work environment through interpersonal relationships and open, transparent communication."), Jan Brewer regains her train of thought, Martha McSally figures out whether she's sending a text message or talking on her phone while walking briskly away from needling activists, a day passes without Chuck Huckelberry sending a lengthy memo or Donald Trump tweeting some even more bizarre conspiracy theory about how he's just the most put-upon soul in all of history, and the Broadway widening project begins (really, just go with the "until the end of time," then — and note we didn't even conceive of the Broadway widening ever, ever, ever ending ... seriously, this clause has been in this thing for like a freaking decade now, and they haven't even started yet. Anyway, the Rosemont Mine will probably get finished before that does.). This greeting is subject to clarification or withdrawal at any time for any reason whatsoever at the sole discretion of the wisher. It is freely transferable with no alteration to the original greeting. It implies no promise by the wisher to actually implement any of the wishes for her/himself or others, and is void where prohibited by law (Snowflake, Saddlebrooke, Seligman, Colorado City, Florence, ISIS-controlled territory (or is that ISIL, or IS?, — but that latter abbreviation makes for confusing headlines, just like taking the periods out of U.S. and typing in title case can do. What is Aleppo? In any case, let's just make sure the Kurds get screwed.)), and is revocable at the sole discretion of the wisher. This wish is warranted to perform as expected within the usual, reasonable application of good tidings for a period not to exceed one calendar year (sigh, back to that bit again) plus one-to-three days grace period, or until the issuance of a subsequent holiday greeting, and said warranty is limited to replacement of this wish or issuance of a new wish at the sole discretion of the wisher. This wish is not covered by Apple Care, whatever corporate settlement that Brnovich keeps bragging about, as if he had anything really to do with it and it didn't take filling out confusing online forms to get a $7 check, or the Patient Protection and Affordable Care Act. If it were, the GOP would be about to have it tossed out, which would be a real War on Christmas, wouldn't it? And why do Republicans hate Apple? If you wish to file a complaint about this wish, please do so in quadruplicate with the District 1 supervisor's office, using a text message or via a Facebook chat or something. Don't worry, they won't tell anybody about it. If you want to find out who else has filed complaints, you'd better make a healthy contribution to the TucsonSentinel.com legal fund (and remember, donating is more than a "construct"). Any litigation arising from the issuance or performance of these holiday greetings must be filed and heard in the High Court of the North Pole. Sadly, Santa has a mixed record on sunshine laws, the tubby bastard. If any portion of this wish shall be held unenforceable in a court of law, the remaining terms of this wish shall remain in force. Come to think of it, the bits about primary voters, computer platforms and baseball teams are already null and void, so there.
Come celebrate the holiday season with a few drinks, a bite to eat and lots of healthy conversation! We'll see you at the the Shanty, 401 E. 9th St., on Thursday, Dec. 19, starting around 6 p.m.
— Dylan, Maria, Paul, Blake, Julie and the rest of the TucsonSentinel.com team